Learned out of bounds tech from elements 10. photo I took in Kuwait 1991

Emotional cocktail

                                 Emotional cocktail

spent time with my friend as I do now and then,

sharing what we have  of our memories and what we choose to express,

some of the emotions that go with the memories  that are hard to digest,

but as friends we go on, because some emotions need to be released.

When it seems to be difficult and tears are so close, there's something about a friend, that can help you get through and when you add in a hug, a touch, a laugh and a dance when you take your next breath you realize this. You just shared an emotional cocktail and with a friend they can taste so good. There is no set recipe but it seems that as long as love is a part of the ingredient the emotions from those memories are better when shared with someone who cares. Someone who if they could as all friends do would gladly take your pain so you wouldn't have to be sad.

Then sadness is an ingredient in an emotional cocktail that needs to be blended with love, concern, compassion, and understanding that sadness is a part of our emotions and there are things in our past, in our memories that cannot be denied or made light of and that no amount of faith or philosophy will take away the pain. Emotional cocktail I had one just the other night shared with a friend as that's what we do. We try not to have too much and most of the time we do not but now and then. I'm looking for something within and realize that my searching makes what I seek seem out of reach.

When I do not search and try to find the feelings to express I give up that illusion that I am capable on my own of expressing the beauty that is beyond me. It is the realization that beauty comes not from me but as a source available to everyone if they would listen and feel the beauty that is around us and in us but at the same time a gift that we might share and not try to possess exclusively for our own purposes.

I wish to reconnect as often as I possibly can to the source beyond me and beyond you the source that is here ,the source that is love a source that is beauty and I must be ready for that when given freely from that source. My house must be clean my heart must be open I'm just a man and don't say that as an excuse but realize that as a man I'm at constant war at one time or another with myself as I believe both men and women are. I seek peace within myself so that peace can be shared in this form with the people in my life now and the people to come.

Made it over to the dentist this morning in Cambria, and did a little bit of video with the go Pro two.

This was an infomercial that Rhonda did for me near the end of 2012. We have had fun with this and laugh every time we see it so thought others might enjoy.

Authors page
Baobabs youtube
Audible.com page

Figured out how to get back to my blog finally

It may be that blogging is not for me, but since I found out how to get back to post a new blog after going through two additional accounts here I am. My interest has been renewed by the possibility of doing a podcast. In some reading material I was reading it said the best way to do this was from a blog.

Not feeling very well today, and I'm sure that my comprehension level is rather low, but I'm going to at least write down my name and password so I can get back to this particular spot which took me so long to return to.

Yesterday I did audition for a book that is searching for a narrator. The name of the book is The Finger. It's a story about getting older in America. I felt that I would be the ideal person to do such a narration, but have not heard back since I submitted my audition. Getting back into recording, and hopefully will learn how to do a better job and according to one video be more professional. I'm not really striving for professionalism, and I'm sure that shows in my work.

I was recently married to Rhonda formally Mendoza who is now Rhonda Riley Whisenant. I'm sure she did not consider the mispronunciations that are to come with this particular last name, but I think that would probably fall under the heading of for better or for worse. Actually  it's been more of a source of amusement for me through the years.

I'm dictating this blog entry, and hopeful that the misinterpretations will be limited, but in case you do come across something that seems a bit out of place it will indicate that I missed something in the translation.

The idea of doing a podcast using the pen name of séance fullofit is appealing to me, so will give that some consideration in the time to come.

For now Rhonda and I are doing very well, and except for a few minor health issues, I'm doing extremely well and so is she. It occurs to me that the Internet can fail, and this seemingly recent journal entry by the name of a blog could be lost. Fortunately I seem to have no shortage of words, or the ability from time to time to string them together into some semblance of coherency.

Hocus-pocus I need to refocus

Getting a little bit better if there's anyone but me keeping track on the frequency of my posting on this blog and I doubt there is, but when you submit something to the world you never know when the world might actually be listening.

I ended my boycott of Facebook and now have an account there under the pen name of Saunce Fullofit. I also began a linkedin account under the same name, and am surprised at seemingly how many people take that website serious.

 I listed myself as an e-book and audio book publisher which to some extent I am, but not to the extent of being professional. I received offers to join different writing clubs and other people that are probably more for real publishers that I will ever be.

Recently had my reoccurring left leg infected from a very dramatic experience in 1989 which hospitalized me at the time. It was the only time and hopefully will be the only time that I went straight from a doctor's office directly to a hospital. I was told at that time the cellulitis would recur throughout the rest of my life and unfortunately as inaccurate as doctors can sometimes be they were accurate in that statement.

Hocus-pocus I need to refocus is a phrase that came to me one morning. It was a quick way to remind myself that sometimes my thoughts can get too serious and too complicated. There only complicated to me, so if I had the ability why not do a little magic and get another view. Of course it is not that easy to do, but I like the simplicity of that particular idea. This goes in conjunction with another thought I had back in the 70s of having a lemon scented brain douche. The idea was to clear out some of the clutter that seems to accumulate within our thoughts. We accumulate quite a few of those thoughts and unfortunately sometimes do not know when to let them go.

 I am beginning to suspect that we do not know how to do that, and even if we did for whatever magical mystical reasons we would retain the thoughts that we have held for many years without really examining them. The pen name mentioned earlier seems to be a very fitting name for me when I am in my self analytical frame of mind. I tried to not get into that particular frame of mind very often because it only leads to more questions and usually ventures off into areas that will probably never be illuminated, and what very faint light that might shine from time to time usually is only a reflection of the very little light that we already can see.

I have stalled once again on my writing of white Bloom's, but I am being a little less harsh on myself for setting that aside at this time. The idea has been with me, and will probably insist and persist until I finally fulfill and complete that idea into the closest thing that I can get to reality. It's very real to me, but then again talking giraffes in my dreams are sometimes real to me.

Continuing on here in Cayucos, glad to be here and cellulitis or not thankful for this opportunity.